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Internet Crazy Parent Guy

There has been a video floating around on Facebook and various blogs. I am not going to link to it.

In the video a father sits in an yard chair wearing a cowboy hat and reads a letter he took from his 15 year old daughter's Facebook wall complaining about her parents. There is little doubt in my mind that his daughter was exaggerating. Teenagers do this, teenagers have always done this. I am almost 38 years old but I well remember what it was like being a teenager. How stressful everything could be. How unfair everything felt. Hell, I am almost 38 years old and I still struggle to find coping methods to deal with the world some times. At 15 I had even less.

The father, literally shaking with rage, read his daughter's private letter aloud, then explained how truly terrible her life would be now. How her life was basically over. Then he takes out a gun and shoots her laptop.

This video is widely praised as amazing parenting. I think it is abuse, plain and simple. Abuse does not always come in the form of a punch to the face or sexual batterment. Abuse most often takes the form of the emotional. This man basically showed his daughter that he can, and he will, destroy her and everything she holds dear if she makes him angry. New reports, coming form the father himself I might add, claim that the daughter is ok with what happened and is adjusting well.

BULLSHIT

If you had a father that pulled out a gun and shot things when you made him mad what would you say when he questioned you on how you felt about his actions? Damn right you would say that everything is ok.

Look, I am not a parent. But I used to be a child and I interact with children and parents every day. I firmly believe discipline is lacking in our modern society. Things ARE different then they were when I was child. I had parents, teachers, coaches, and intructors who expected certain things from me and I gave them because I understood if I didn't I would loose privileges. My martial arts instructors where some of most discipline minded people I have ever known and I respected them. I respected their insight, their skill, and I wanted to be like them so much. My teachers seemed to be successful, achieving adults. The type we all wished to be. That was the world I lived in, that was the life I led. Still I rebelled, still I complained. I said a million times worse things abut my parents and teachers then this girl did on her Facebook page. Because I had not yet learned the skills on how to deal with the emotional stress of living in this world gave me.

Do I wish for a return to this kind of atmosphere? Not really. At the same time these people in my life were earning my respect they were also destroying me. Not a week went by in my martial arts school without an instructor, an adult, referring to a student, a child, as a faggot. This student was usually me and most times it happened where no one else could hear. Always "joking" of course but all the same. I remember our health teacher in high school literally cringing and complaining, to students, how he was forced to speak about homosexuality. This isn't just about gay issues though. These same men were leading lives that were so far removed from what they were teaching us. They put on an image of perfection while their home lives fell apart. Pretty often from their own doing. What I am saying here is that this world I lived in, believed in with all my heart, was a lie. And the women role models in my life, all teachers, were some of the most angry people I ever have known. With a handful of exceptions some of the worst human beings I have ever known. They demeaned or ignored whomever they didn't want to work with. They were bad at their jobs and then blamed the students. I don't know much about their personal lives but professionally they were a joke.

If you tell me how you got your ass kicked as a child and this led you to be a stronger adult. That is a lie too.

I agree with the concept that parents need to be parents first. I have seen the mistake many times where a parent wishes to be the best friend. It never works and is likely a form of abuse or neglect as well. But you are supposed to be a functioning adult. A role model. If you're wondering why the world keeps saying you are a crazy lunatic it may well be because you appear to us as a crazy fucking lunatic.

I hope this guy learns something. But I doubt it. He believes he already has it figured out.

Comments

( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
uberrod
Feb. 11th, 2012 11:00 pm (UTC)
I'm not as quick to jump on the abuse bandwagon on this. It seemed the main problem he had was that the daughter was posting on facebook and blocking her parents from seeing it. This was also a repeat offense and the girl was warned of the consequences if she did that again. Blocking her parents from seeing what she, a minor, is posting on facebook opens up room for other problems that the parents would be unaware. Internet stalkers, bullying, etc.

It also seemed that the parents bought the laptop for her. Now if she had paid for the laptop and he shot it I would fully agree that this was abuse.

Granted he did go to extremes and also granted her complaints were obviously exaggerated, but abuse? As a minor she lost privileges she had been given. Would it make a difference if the father had just thrown the laptop out rather than shot it?

I was spanked occasionally as a child by my parents and teachers (in elementary school only). For me it was very effective. At school, it wasn't the pain of being hit that was the worst part, but rather the public humiliation of being spanked in front of your classmates.

I was never regularly beaten, nor was I spanked at school very often. Maybe I was a particularly obedient child as I recall other children needing to be spanked quite often in school. I remember thinking what was wrong with them? Why are they causing trouble.

I often hear about very smart kids acting badly because they are bored in a class not moving fast enough for their intelligence. I was very bright as a child and if I finished my work I kept myself busy with my own interests. I never felt a need to disrupt the class out of boredom. I had books to read and stories to write.

In a way I have to agree with one thing that father said. Kids have it way too easy today. With cell phones, internet, video games they are very used to instant gratification.

In the end I feel will most likely need to agree to disagree on this matter. I'm not writing this comment to tell you your viewpoints and opinions are wrong or to sway you to my point of view. Mostly I'm just offering to give you another viewpoint to consider.
nontacitare
Feb. 12th, 2012 05:52 am (UTC)
Would it make a difference if the father had just thrown the laptop out rather than shot it?

Yes, it would have made a dramatic difference. Had he taken the laptop away, it would have said, "This computer is a privilege that I granted you. As your parent, I can revoke that privilege." By shooting the computer the father basically said, "Remember, I have a gun, and if you make me angry I will use it." This was not discipline, this was not "a little extreme." This was a father threatening his daughter with a gun, and no one has a right to do that.
spottedtoad
Feb. 12th, 2012 01:49 pm (UTC)
Anybody stop to think that maybe this is just people trying to get their 15 minutes of internet fame and the whole thing was faked?
seamus_mcnasty
Feb. 13th, 2012 03:20 am (UTC)
I watched it and thought a) hillbilly b) control freak c)extreme d)dumb ass just wasted all that money to upgrade why not sell it, lock it up, give it away e) I hope this is face f) if this isn't fake he gets angry and shots things, not good g) fucking litter bug just tossed his cigarette to the ground h) yea he is a redneck, out of control, heehaw, dumb fuck, who probably waves his stars and bars flag and talks about the president being an uppity Muslim...and abuses his family. But hey that's just my gut reaction....
uberrod
Feb. 14th, 2012 12:06 am (UTC)
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )